10 Truths About Growing Up I Wish I Knew When I Was Younger



Black and white shot of attractive woman wearing turtleneck jumper in Tamarama
Matthew Kane / Unsplash

1. Nobody starts big.

I wish I knew when I started working that a college degree doesn’t guarantee anyone instant success. And just because you’re great in school doesn’t automatically mean you will immediately be great in life. Classrooms are so much different from the real world. Almost every one of us literally starts from scratch as soon as we graduate. Our diplomas are nothing compared to life and professional experiences. We have so much dirt to eat before we become someone big.

2. Humility will save you from a lot of disappointments.

Assuming no one cares about your precious feelings will save you tons of disappointment. Because the truth is, you’re probably not as special as you think you are. Demanding attention or going out of your way to get attention will kind of make you appear like a psychopath. I have met so many people who act as if they deserve to be treated differently. I think before we expect special treatment, we have to ask ourselves what good have we done for us to be deserving of it. If we can’t think of a valid answer, I guess it’s better that we stay humble.

3. You are capable of turning off your love for certain people.

This is a skill I damn hope I had when I was in the beginning stage of my 20s. I used to be too kind, too forgiving, too smiley, too much of a big-hearted person. But the world is full of horrible people who took advantage of my openness. As time goes by, I’ve learned to turn off my feelings for someone who does nothing but drag me down. It takes time to develop this, but once you get the hang of it, it will be an easy thing for you to do. You just have to point out who’s giving you so much negativity, decide you don’t want to be around them anymore and drop them out of your life for good. Then wash your hands clean and move on.

4. You don’t have to react to everything that’s happening around you.

Blocking and muting don’t end on social media. It’s applicable in real life too! You don’t have to waste a second of your time with people who desperately want to get an emotion out of you. Nobody owes you anything, in the same that you don’t owe anyone anything. Just go live a lawful life and don’t give a crap. These people who give you so many worries will definitely not matter in few years time. You’re probably not going to see them anymore a year after today, or a month, heck even tomorrow. So it’s okay if you can’t force yourself to talk to someone you don’t feel like talking to. You have free will and choices, always remember that.

5. A broken heart should not be an excuse for not loving again.

You’ve been fooled. You’ve been ghosted. You’ve been given promises that never came true. But guess what? You’re not the only one. We’re not only here to reap the joy that love brings, we’re here to feel the pain and brokenness too. And these experiences make our journeys here on earth more interesting. Because we all have common things to share and complain about. Refusing to fall in love again just because somebody ripped your heart before is such a bummer. Give yourself a break and give romance another try. It’s nice to go all crazy in the name of love once in a while.

6. Less is more.

I know this is overrated and you’ve heard it a billion of times already, but yes, I’m one of those people who believe that less is more. Research shows that clutter causes anxiety. Boring fact, but still makes sense. Maybe you like holding on to things that have value and history. Maybe you like collecting clothes. Or maybe you just generally love material things. Whatever your reason is, you can’t deny the possibility that you will end up not using most of them after some time. Stop being afraid of coming across as cheap just because you only buy stuff that you need.

7. It hurts to lose friends but you’ll get over it.

You’re going to change a lot and so does everyone in your age. Some friendships that you had for years will fall apart. And you’re going to be sad about it for a short period of time, but soon you’ll realize it’s bound to happen. It’s part of growing up. You will lose people. You will move somewhere else. You will start a new life, have a new job, pursue different things. You don’t have to feel guilty for outgrowing the ones you used to share most of your time with. Nobody can give you an absolute guarantee that they’ll stay in your life forever.

8. Timing can be your worst enemy. 

You can like somebody so bad but if timing isn’t on your side, it’s going to do everything to separate the two of you. Timing is mean like that. Sometimes you’ll find out the reason why it’s acting like a devil. Sometimes you don’t. But if you think about it, maybe not knowing the answer will actually hurt you less. Not having a complete control of your fate in your hands is normal. It’s something we all go through. And the sooner you learn to be okay with it, the more peaceful your life will be.

9. Not all of us are going to end up in a happy relationship.

Not all of us will have a white picket fence house and a sweet marriage when we grow old so you can take your opinions about happy endings somewhere. We all want different things. Our dreams aren’t the same. You can’t judge people for their alternative choices in life. Some of us just don’t want to settle down for reasons you may or may not understand. And if you aren’t able to respect that, the kindest thing that you can do is to keep your comments to yourself.

10. Legacy matters more than money. 

You know what they say…you can’t bring your money with you on your grave. Sure, you can have millions and billions of net worth, but if you don’t leave something great and positive that people can remember you by, what’s the point of you being here in the first place? I’m sure we were all put here for a bigger purpose. We didn’t just sprout from the ground. And we are all given one life to make an impact, whether small or big, around us. If you’re only working hard for money, you’re probably living a misleading life. Work hard because you want to start a change. Work hard because you want to leave a remarkable history for the generations to come. TC mark



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