1. Stop snoozing through your alarm in the morning! Studies show that hitting the snooze button multiple times actually makes you 62% more tired. And it also wakes up the spirit residing in the ether of your bedroom, thereby pissing them off and making them more determined to stay in your space and terrorize you.
2. Use a daily planner! It’s a great way to keep track of upcoming meetings, and to help you to remember which day you booked an appointment with the exorcist who will purify your sleeping quarters from the angry ghost living there.
3. Measure your goals! This will make you more of a go-getter person, and will also show your apartment ghost that you’re a hardworking person who can’t be spooked easily.
4. Read more books! Start with the New York Times best seller list and finish with nonfiction that has been written about expelling unwanted residence phantoms.
5. Exercise! It will increase your endorphins, which will make you feel more awake and will inspire you to be more productive. Try jogging, weight lifting, or running around your apartment with sage and shouting “You are not welcome here!”
6. Start a gratitude journal! Write down things you are thankful for right now, and also future things you are thankful for, such as the time in your future life when there’s no longer an evil spirit trying to force sleep paralysis upon you.
7. Create a daily mantra! Include one thing life-related, and one thing ghost-related. Example: “I deserve to accomplish my dreams; I don’t deserve to be haunted by a spook monster.”
8. Purge the clutter in your home! And then also purge the ghost in your home.